Moments To Be Grateful For

As a father, I am always trying to teach my kids between right and wrong, between honest and well, you know the rest, the list can go on and on.  It seems sometimes that there are so many moments where I feel what I am doing is a waste of time.  I seriously feel sometimes that nothing is getting through and that every ounce of effort I put in is being combated with a dumb kid move or the "I don't know" reasoning.  In fact, over the last few weeks, even with the threats that Santa will not come, I have felt like my kids just don't listen or even hear what I am saying.  I mean, how often, be honest, do you tell a child over and over to do something, to get something, or to listen, to only have them go do or say something completely different right after your comment.  Me, everyday this happens.  I mean, someone shoot me!

So my wife comes home the other day and says, I need to tell you something about Brenden (our 9 year old).  I think to myself, Brenden is a pretty good kid, but once in a while, well, dumb will happen.  My wife says, "Brenden saw a person drop a dollar on the ground", I had no initial thought.  Most of the time we think, ok, the kid thinks they find money, so it is their money, even if they watched a person drop it.  So my wife continues, "he saw the person drop the dollar, picked it up and ran over to them to give it back to them.  I was so happy to hear that.  It is such a simple thing, I mean it is only a dollar, 100 pennies.  The fact that he thought that was the right thing to do, that he had that thought in his kid brain, that was wonderful to me.  Brenden is always one to do good, and choose the right, but in this case, it deals with money.  Money changes people, let alone a young kid.

I was so proud of him and his honesty.  He will make an amazing older brother, missionary and father some day.  If I could just get him to put his shoes in his room.

So the 6-year old in our home, Caden cannot be left out of this.  It was interesting to watch him the other day.  We had just finished prayer, were putting everyone to bed.  Our youngest boy, Isaac fell asleep on the couch.  We told the boys to get in their beds, and we were helping our oldest daughter get to bed.  There seem to be a lot going on that night, and we were busy helping her with something.  So when Caden came back in the room, I was ready to yell at him, "get to bed".  You understand right, if you read above, you understand.  For some reason, I kept my cool and just looked at him.  He said, Dad, I put a blanket on Isaac while he is asleep on the couch.  Great, I told him, and I was back to helping my wife and daughter.  A few minutes later, he comes back in.  Again, think if my opening words, I am ready to yell at him, "go to bed!!!", but I keep my cool.  He says, "Dad, I put a pillow under Isaac so he can sleep good until you take him to bed".  So I look at him, this rambunctious 6-year old who loves to do the opposite of what he should sometimes.  I look at him and thank him for what he is doing and for caring.  I tell him that is very nice and that he has a good heart.

So two things, one, don't yell right away.  It can sting later.  Two, wow!  That is a sweet thing to do, and a very charitable thing from my view point.  Something that a dad can always be proud of.

These young boys have a lot to learn, they have a lot to practice and overcome (just being a kid can be hard enough), but I have to say, maybe sometimes things are heard.  Maybe sometimes they are getting through the wax in the ears.  Regardless, I am proud of my boys and they great men they are becoming.

Holiday Season and My Thoughts

At the beginning of the holiday season, things were just great.  Family was looking forward to Christmas, kids were excited to see Santa, and I was looking forward to what I might receive for Christmas.  Since Thanksgiving, all I have thought about were presents and decorations.  You know, the typical ways we celebrate the time of year.  We even have a brief service project in mind, one that would include and help a family member, but nothing we had to go out of our way for.  You know, write a check and all is well.

Move to this morning, December 5, 2011.  I received a phone call from my Mother-In-Law.  When I answered, she sounded a bit down.  I said hello in a “chipper” way to let her know I was happy to hear from her.  That did not work.  She immediately said, “Jeremy, Greg is being taken off life support today”.

I was playing basketball the Saturday after Thanksgiving, Greg was there with his three kids (they sat watching) and he was there with his brother and my brother-in-laws.  We had a good time, and of course, Greg was the hot item, tall, fast, hit three’s like crazy and was the most in shape of all of us.

This young man is part of a family that is very close with my Wife’s family.  They have known each other for years.  And it hit me so hard to hear that he will be gone for Christmas, taken in the prime of his life, leaving three kids, a fourth on the way and a wonderful wife behind.

So now, I sit here a few hours later, a few tears have been shed, and I began to think about how many have it so hard this time of year that I know.  I began to think more about this family losing their father, I took thought to my sister who is pregnant, but we know that the baby, who will make it full term, may only have a few hours to live after birth, my heart began to pound for my brother who is divorced and will not be with his children on Christmas day, I began to think of Kevin, who is in the process of divorce.  My sweet sister-in-law who is trying for divorce, who has so many challenges and as many responsibilities. Then I remembered our Vick Family Christmas project, Jeremy, Brooke’s cousin who has cancer and then to my great Uncle who just found out he has cancer and lost his job.  Then to my friend who is helping a family with 11-kids, no fathers in the picture, heating house on a wood stove and cooking food on a hot plate.

So now I sit here writing this note to myself in appreciation to my God for all he has done for me and for what he has provided me and my family.  A home, food, health, my needs, my wants and even an abundance of love.  I think about the trials these families are going through and how strong they must be to have this trial, but how hard it must be regardless.  I wonder how anyone can handle such situations without losing it.  I know that I would be a mess and have no patience for any of these things.  Even harder, as a man, feeling helpless, like there was nothing I could do.

So I take this time to tell myself, my family, you, that this year will not be the status quo!  There is much to be done in God’s Kingdom and I am blessed enough to get it done.  It will take some thinking and working with my Wife, but we will not sit idly by and just “write a check”.  We will provide service, we will provide love and we will provide for those in need, their needs and if we can, wants!

Happy Holidays to all, Merry Christmas to everyone and God bless you all!